Preview of Night of the Gnomes
Night of the Gnomes
Four
garden gnomes rise up in rebellion against their human masters.
Cast requirements
Suitable
for kids aged 10-12
11
kids 4 boys, 5 girls and 2 gender neutral
Characters in Order of
Appearance
Narrator
The Norwegian Family
Thomas
Verstag
Alexandra
Verstag
Ilsa
Verstag
The Gnomes
King
Fijord
Doctor
Djorksted
The
Maestro
Fourth
Gnome
The Tourists
Patricia
Mom
Aunt Julia
Set
(A
little house, which can be little more than a flat surrounded by
shrubbery, trees and mushrooms)
Props
Cup
of coffee
Map
Old
fake musket
Measuring
tape
Long
sheet of paper
Night of The Gnomes
(Lights
up on a little house, which can be little more than a flat surrounded
by shrubbery, trees and mushrooms. Everything should be very simple.
4 gnomes in various costumes stand frozen in the garden)
Narrator-For
centuries gnomes have battled with humans. Humans have battled with
gnomes. The battle of Mjorstad was a major turning point. Fought in
the deep snow, the short gnomish legs could not function successfully
in the Scandinavian winter elements. Assisted by the Gods of the
North; Thor, Odin and Fria, the humans crushed the gnomish hordes.
The surviving gnomes were taken to Asgard and imprisoned on the lawns
and in the gardens of the Norse Gods and Demi-gods and placed under a
spell. Though the gnomes were still technically alive, they were
unable to move, their little hearts unable to beat, their blood;
frozen in their veins. They could not move, even when knocked down by
rampaging kids. Oh, the humiliation of these once-mighty short
warriors! The time came when Odin tired of the gnomish remnants of
this great race. He told the mischievous Loki to take the gnomes and
plant them in the gardens and lawns of the great civilizations of
man, to stand forever guard, to scare away the crows, the pigeons and
small vicious children. But our story does not end there. A peculiar
family of gardeners had managed to secure four of these hideous
garden gnomes. The head of the family had delved, yes that's the word
I'm using, delved into the Scandinavian myths, and he knew a day of
reckoning was at hand. He knew the day of nomenclature was at hand,
the day that gnomes would finally get back their names and rebel
against their human masters. One misunderstood man understood. His
story.
(The
Gnomes start marching in place and chanting)
Gnome
Chant
We are gnomes great and small
We are gnomes great and small
We will join our brothers
and rise up!
Rise up trolls and elves and gnomes
Rise up and take human homes
Kill the humans!
Kill the humans!
We are gnomes great and small
We are gnomes great and small
(The
gnomes freeze)
Thomas-(Enters) I feel a reckoning coming on, a day
that the earth will remember. Yes sir; you know it. I'm talking about
gnomes. Folks round here may think I'm crazy, not playing with a full
deck, cognitively impaired. They call me Thomas Verstag; the
Norwegian nutbar, the Scandinavian psycho. But I've ciphered through
my books. Done some internet investigation. I have read my tea
leaves, searched the stars at night and called on roadside fortune
tellers. All the signs point to a coming resurrection, a coming
Ragnorok. where the old gods will be replaced by these little fellers
here, the fearsome and hideous gnome. (He starts to talk to the
gnomes) Hey little fellers. What are you up to? Don't think I
don't know what's going on in those little wooden heads of yours.
Alexandra-(Enters) Papa, who are you talking to, and
why are you up so early?
Thomas-The night of the gnome is upon us.
Alexandra-But papa, these things aren't real. They are
manufactured, by unskilled labour by the looks of things, but
manufactured they are. Ever since mama took a vow of silence, you
have, how should I put this delicately? Gone off the deep end.
Thomas-Shush daughter! Look at this! These gnomes have moved!
Alexandra-Oh papa.
Thomas-I suspected as much. Look! (He crouches down beside
the gnomes) I put stones by their feet and the stones are here,
(Indicating a small distance) and their feet are there. (Holds
out his hand) Measuring tape!
Alexandra-Oh, papa, what is to become of us? We will be the
laughing stock of Nordverk.
Thomas-The measuring tape if you don't mind. I will show you
who has gone crazy and who is merely a genius.
Alexandra-Here. (Hands him the measuring tape)
Thomas-(Measures the gnome's feet)
Alexandra-Well?
Thomas-I knew it! 5 centimeters! They have transported
themselves, each of them, by 5 centimeters. This is historic!
Alexandra-They'll be running marathons before long.
Thomas-(Stands up) I am afraid my dear child, that is
not possible. The muscles stiffen up after so many centuries of
non-use. They atrophy. Besides; gnomes were never known for their
cardiovascular abilities. Note the short and powerful legs. Good for
sprinting. They could bring down an antelope, an antelope I tell you!
See this little guy here. Teeth like piano keys. Used to be known as
the Maestro. See those incisors. Could take the flesh off your bones
in seconds. See this sprightly feller. See the regalness?
Alexandra-They all look the same to me.
Thomas-Don't they teach you nuthin' at school! That's King
Fijord, king of all gnomes!
(End of Script Sample)
A royalty of ten dollars per performance will be charged for any public performance of each play purchased, even if there is no admission charged for that performance. A one-time duplication fee of ten dollars will be charged to cover any copying and distribution of that script.
A royalty of ten dollars per performance will be charged for any public performance of each play purchased, even if there is no admission charged for that performance. A one-time duplication fee of ten dollars will be charged to cover any copying and distribution of that script.
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